Day 29 of 31 Days of Connecting
My son and I have been butting heads. He’s in the throes of the terrible twos and most of our conversations are conflicts. For example: “Go potty, Ben.” “No!” “Should I pull down your pants or should you pull down your pants?” “I do it.” (Tries, can’t) “Should I help you?” “No!” (I sit there) “You do it!!!” (I start to do it) “No I do it!!!” (he tries) “I can’t!!! You do it!” (I start) “Not the underwear!!!”
And repeat.
I’ve been so stressed about our relationship these days that I find myself wanting to pull away from him in order to avoid more fighting. Fighting. With a 2 year old. Who would have thought parenting amounted to this?
But then yesterday I remembered something I had read about these clashes of interests. About these scream matches and tantrums. When it seems my son wants nothing to do with me, that is when I need to hold him close.
So this morning, even though we had to get ready to go, we sat together. We were still. I don’t remember how he got on my lap, but once he was there, he stayed there. I put my face in his hair, he leaned into my chest, and we just were.
Still.
Silent.
For ten minutes.
In those moments of stillness, of ceasing from running from one activity to the next, of remembering that I am his mama, of noticing that he needs me, of treasuring him, I thanked God.
He is still my son.
Nothing will ever change my love for him.
Not even the terrible twos.
Look at how good and pleasing it is
when families live together as one!
Psalm 133:1 CEB
This post is part of the larger Five Minute Friday community found on Kate Motaung’s blog. We write, for five minutes, together. No major edits. No second guesses, just writing to connect, to grow, to be. Today’s writing prompt: Still.
What a great post, and oh how important it is to be still with our little wiggly guys!
Thank you! Important – and hard – but always good.
Awww, cute little man. Thanks for sharing. Stopping from 31 day survivor group.
Thanks, Tobi!
What a cutie! I don’t have kids but, I can only imagine the patience it must take. Good for you for taking time to love him through the tough moments! Great post
Thanks, Moi!
I love how you took time to be still with your son. Oh the twos….I remember them fondly…because I’m 7 years away from them!!! Hang in there momma!! The time you invest now will pay dividends when he’s older b
It’s so ironic, because I usually love toddlers. You know, when they’re happy. Thanks for your words of encouragement!
This is so sweet, and WOW so reminiscent of a post I wrote a few months back. I know exactly what you’re going through, and I learned the same lesson. Good for you for learning the lesson, for paying attention, for putting aside your tendencies as a mama to rush through and just GET IT DONE. It’s so hard.
(My posts that you reminded me of… maybe some extra encouragement:
http://coddledlittlelife.blogspot.com/2013/01/tears-and-snuggles.html
http://coddledlittlelife.blogspot.com/2014/09/a-good-day.html)
Thanks, Sarah! I find it reassuring that I’m not the only one learning as a mama. I’ll check out your posts layer today, when I have the chance.
That’s a great reminder of touch being a healing quality. It’s also one of the 5 love languages and long before infants know the word love, they feel it through our touch. Thanks for sharing 🙂
Thanks for your insights! I honestly haven’t considered my kids’ love languages yet. Hmm… now I have something to explore with them. Thanks for your comment!
I really like this. I want to do this often, hold my son. I want to remember this when it gets hard. Thanks so much for sharing!
I want to remember, too. 🙂
Love it!!
Thank you!