Depression has been my constant companion since I was 16 years old. It has oppressed me with its hopelessness, its despair, its sense of futility, anger, and deceit. Yes, deceit. Depression lies to me. Depression tells me there is no life for me. Depression tells me there will be no moment better than this. Depression […]
How I am doing with all of this change…
“Are you excited?!” The question comes at me every day from people who are excited for me with the expectation that I must be thrilled by the changes coming my way. But I only look at them and can answer with only one word that sounds truthful: Overwhelmed. Today. Last week. Last month. I have […]
Why Depression Won’t Win: An Easter Refl
I am a girl who feels she is not enough. Perfection seems like it should be possible and yet I fall short. I snap at my kids. I am jealous of other women. I am irritable, selfish, materialistic. I see my sin. I struggle with depression, shame, and fear. And I know I would be […]
Why I Have a Dream
This is my family. My boys and my cousin’s son, in their Christmas jammies, completely oblivious to the fact that 50 or 60 years ago this would not have been possible. Unaware that hate between their races exists in the world. Instead, they embrace each other. They love each other. Last week, Jack came home […]
Why I didn’t wait until Christmas for th
Candlelight flickers, twinkle lights shine, and the sliver of the moon suggests the sun it reflects. Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. We choose to recognize that Light wins in a world of darkness as we adorn our houses, trees, and streets with glimmers of joy. For in celebration […]
How this Perfectionist is Picking Hersel...
I am a perfectionist. A perfectionist who doesn’t want to do anything wrong, fears others showing me my failures, and who is constantly aware of what I could do better. I am tempted to define myself by my behavior, my finished to do list, or my perfect children who eat, sleep, and produce according to […]
Why I am Grateful for My Friends
Day 22 of 31 Days of Connecting Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all […]
How God Cared for Me
Day 20 of 31 Days of Connecting The other day, in a fit of exhaustion, I posted a link to my sermon on trusting God. I promised that part of my story (which starts here) is part of the sermon… and it is. But since I know most people do not have 30+minutes to listen to […]
Why are relationships so hard?
Day 1 of 31 Days of Connecting The pain surrounds me. I’ve yelled at my kids. I’ve yelled at my spouse. I’ve cried buckets of tears. My eyes are swollen. My sister called crying. My friends have called crying. We are all suffering, struggling, in pain and frustrated. “Why are relationships so hard?” I know […]