It’s Friday and time for Five Minute Friday. Every week, writers around the world follow the same one word prompt and write for five minutes. No major edits. No second guesses. This week’s prompt from Kate: Sing.

We are entering yet another new season as a family. A season I have feared, frankly. I have begun looking for full time work and it brings up so many anxieties.

For the first time in years, I have had trouble sleeping through the night.

Things from my past, old wounds that I thought were healed, have torn at the seams and I am unsure how to catch my breath if I let myself think about it too long.

So I keep busy, preoccupied.

A wise woman asked me, “When do you feel the most alive?”

The answer for me is when I am teaching. When I am sharing the Good News of God’s grace, goodness, redemption, and salvation.

I believe I am meant to be a Bible teacher.

Just as the psalmist below, God has lifted me out of a pit. A pit of depression, fear, self-hatred, and sadness. God has put a song in my mouth and I must sing it.

I waited patiently for the Lord;
    he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
    out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
    and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
    a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear the Lord
    and put their trust in him.

Psalm 40:1-3

So I look for a job knowing that this will always be part of it. I must cry out. I must share my story.

I also fear that writing will fall away when I go back to work, just be a hobby I did that one time. But I trust that He has begun a good work and He will complete it.

And that’s why I sing.

p.s. The following song has become a theme song, a calling in itself to me from the Lord.